Monday, November 19, 2007

The Internal Debate

"Hey Fanelli, this bike racing thing is a pretty selfish pursuit ...especially the way you do it!"

"Huh!? What are you blabbering about now Fennell? Give me some reasons why it's selfish."

"How much time you got?"

"Seriously dude, what's your point?! Give me some reasons!!"

"OK, for one, you spend way too much time with it."

"Too much time?? I only do 10-15 hours a week, check my training entries on this blog you idiot!!"

"That's just your riding time. What about all the other stuff... checking the weather, getting ready for rides, packing for races, traveling to races, cleaning and fixing your bike, looking up race results, chatting on email, reading blogs,... the list goes on. Add it ALL up Bud, you're probably doing at least 30 hours a week with that stuff."

"Big deal, what else am I gonna do with that time!?"

"You're kidding, right? How about WORKING, as in, MAKING SOME MONEY!! When you jumped off the career ladder for this silliness, you left a million bucks on the table. What a moron! But if you're too lazy to pursue a career, then at least work on the house and make dinner once and awhile."

"Well, OK... but Mrs. Fanelli spends a lot of time exercising too, what with running, swimming, spinning, aerobics, etc. Shouldn't I get to do my thing too??"

"She goes out at 6:00 AM fercrissakes. And she still makes lunches for kids before leaving on a run! And I can't believe you brought up spinning and aerobics... SHE GETS PAID TO DO THOSE THINGS YOU DORK!!"

"Hey, I made some prize money this year. Maybe a thousand bucks."

"And how much did you spend Einstein??"

"OK, give me another reason."

"How about, you look like an emaciated concentration-camp survivor ...ya think that's what Mrs. Fanelli wants in a husband??"

"Better than a flabby butt and a beer belly."

"So instead you have NO BUTT and pencil arms."

"But I'm healthy... think how much we save on medical expenses."

"Remind me again... how much did that clavicle surgery cost??"

"Shut up and give me another reason."

"Bike racing is not very friendly to the environment."

"You're on crack. Bikes are GREAT for the environment."

"Sure, if you commute by bike. But that's not what you do, is it? Instead you load your bike into a van and drive several hundred miles just to ride around in circles for 90 minutes."

"Look, this is what I do. It's part of my identity... been doing it since I was 13 years old."

"That's the problem! Normal people grow out of these things. It's time to move on. Face it, you're a middle aged has-been, or more accurately, a never-was. You are declining physically and will probably make a total fool of yourself if you continue."

"Well, thanks for your opinion but it's time for you to go now."

"Hey, don't do that! Put that down!! What the..."

"Buh-bye"

Now, where were we... Oh yeah, check out the just-released 2008 calendar. Time to start getting ready!

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

Right on the money old man!
Leave the million on the table.
Life is too short.
Retire reasonably and happy.

Anonymous said...

the calender is kinda crap this next year... i see way too many concrete crits... i feel even better now about retiring my butt from this crazy sport...like you Mark i've been racing bikes since i was 13 , but motivation has gone, i can't deal with trying to squeeze training in at lunch time and early morning weekend rides any more...good luck for next season

Gary Scott

Marco Fanelli said...

> Right on the money old man!

No, no, no, no, no... Not old, not old...

Old = over 60
Middle age = 30 to 60
Young = under 30

Scottie- I saw your comment about retiring on socalcycling, and I was going to reply that sooner or later, you'd get back into cycling. I figure you're addicted to the sport just like everyone else, but that it may take a few years away before you realize it! Let me ask: how many people have you known that have been riding for as long as you and successfully walked away for good?

And yeah, I agree about the calendar. Sad not to see CtC and West LA GP for 2008.

Anonymous said...

I just go by this one:
Old = older than me
Then I'll never be old.

btw:
what is your alter-ego referring to here?
"Hey, don't do that! Put that down!! What the..."

Jason said...

That was awesome! Laughed out loud at the pencil arms. I swear I have that same argument (I mean discussion) with me wife all the time. She tells me how thin I'm getting and I say you should see Marco or Smitty. I'm like the Hulkster compared to those dudes.
You need to bring up your entry from last year were you went into detail on the REAL cost of this silly endeavor.

Anonymous said...

Fennel,

It sounds like you have some real issues...maybe riding more would help you work them out. :)

Mrs. Fanelli said...

The best thing about your riding and staying in shape is that it keeps me in shape. Best diet in the world.... Don't want to be outweighed by the hubby.

Mrs. Fanelli said...

Reverse that. Don't want to outweigh the hubby.

TnA said...

Mrs. Fanelli,
I hear you can out arm-wrestle him though, right?

I'm sure that comes in "handy"...:-)

Marco Fanelli said...

> btw:
> what is your alter-ego referring to here?
> "Hey, don't do that! Put that down!! What the..."

Let's just say he won't be bugging me anymore...

Hulk Jason- I've never seen bigger calves on a bike racer than yours!

> It sounds like you have some real issues...
> maybe riding more would help you work them out. :)

Damn good advice! I'll give it a try.

Mrs. F- No need to worry your skinny little self.

TnA- She cannot out arm-wrestle me ...but she CAN do more push-ups than me. More than most guys I think. As in around 50. Can you do 50 perfect ones? I bet a guy that she could do more than him. With both his ego and his money on the line, she still beat him! It was awesome!!

TnA said...

Marco wrote:
"TnA- She cannot out arm-wrestle me ..."

Are you sure? I'll bet you that she can.

TnA said...

Oh yeah...about the 2008 calendar...what ignoramus scheduled the district championship TT on the same weekend as Sea Otter?

Dorks...

Anonymous said...

mark - i hear you but my problem is i've been spoiled growing up and racing in Ireland,,,road races every weekend and i had stopped for 5 years before i came back again in 2005...but the only thing that really kept me motivated was the fact that i went back to Ireland each year to race some road and stage races...but now for the next 2 years at least i won't be going back so there's nothing left to motivate me... but who knows maybe i'll make a come back for 45+...but by then you'll be 55+ :)

Scottie

Anonymous said...

Strangest thing...we discovered that our scrawny cat, 6.5 lbs. before defecation, is a newly classified breed called a Fanelli! Her given name is Nicky, however in light of this shocking revelation, her nickname is BOB (Bag of Bones)!

Mrs. Luke

P.S. Yes, we feed her...high metabolism!?!?

Anonymous said...

lots'o crits, was hopin' for more climbin'.

Marco Fanelli said...

> lots'o crits, was hopin' for more climbin'.

That makes two of us, Anonymo!